Even though I care, I dont.. so whatever....

For past 4-5 days, I have found myself In a state to where I just cant sleep.
I am not sure why but suspect a reason.

For those who may not know,  I AM BI-POLAR.. yes.. I am a crazy fuck.
and for past 5-6months I have finally taken meds for it, which BEFORE HAND I fell into MANY BORED/SLEEPLESS SPELLS, 
then after taking Abilify... was finally able to sleep and feel half ass normal.
Feeling half ass normal for me means simply being able to get along with less then half of you.


Anyways, during that time i was VERY productive and slept every night. Now I cant.
I am wondering if maybe I am now stabilized to the point where the meds are no longer working
and need an increase? I guess I wont find out until I see the Doc next month yet hope I dont have to wait 
a month to be able to sleep again, on top of being bored every day until then.

Not sure how many people realize this, but being sooooo bored every day and all day(even when you have stuff you want to do... and yes I KNOW THIS IS ALSO A SIGN OF DEPRESSION YET I AM FAR FROM AND HAVE NO REASON TO BE DEPRESSED)..... just sucks ass and makes you want to sleep all day....but guess what? YOU CANT SLEEP! ACK!.. WTF DO I DO?

I just had to share this... something I saw somewhere!

WOOT!

(Insert Friend-Serving Entry Here)

ahh.... much better.

Maybe!

umm, read the topic here

This will be my last post in LiveJournal.
There is really no need to have a LJ account for a couple reasons.....

1. No one post comments so most likly no one reads anything I post.
2. I already own a blog hosting site.

Therefore from now on all my post will be held at http://site4me.us
with my blog url being http://www.site4me.us


have fun, and here is my last LJ post....

If I were to ever write a letter to Mr. Bush, it would probably be something like this....

Dear Mr. Prezident Bush,

Hello Mr. Bush. My name is blahblah, today I was wanting to write you to talk to you. I know you will never read this letter personally, as with many of the decisions you make daily, but I still feel compelled to write. So many things I want to say, but with the lower budget planned, I am sure there aren't enough staff to acomadate such a venture. Therefore, I will attempt to make this somewhat short.

From your first term, you were badly hated. You held the lowest approval ratings in decades. Your inuagral speech was visited with vegatables and debri being thrown at your car. From your first day in office(remember, I am talking about your first term..) the U.S. dollar started to slip in value as the U.S. deficit started to soar. Oil companies loved you. Big Business Loved you. The Bin Laden Family loved your family(remember the 30billion they have invested?). But the American public hated you. You couldn't hold a speech without messing up. You could barely p-ro-now-nce words. You were just plain goofy. Dick Cheny was never seen. Haliburton was never happier. Pharmecutical companies loved you. Yet, Americans hated you.

Then Septemeber 11, 2001 happened. I have never seen public opinion change so fast(and fast it does change). People loved you. You loved fear. You saw how fear was the only way you could control. You saw fear put the power in your hands so much and how badly you needed a change. You escorted the Bin Laden family out of the U.S. maybe to protect them and your money, or maybe because it was all planned to begin with. You made immediate changes to better 'secure' us from terrorist. You declared war on a failure from your fathers past. You forget all about the main supposed objective(Osama). You still could barely speak. Oil companies, Pharmacutical, Big Corporations loved you even more. Ohh, lets not now forget about the Armed Forces and Defense Contractors.

It seems that now you finally got America on your side. But, Mr. Bush you sadly forgot one important thing. The World.

With your supposed securing ameria plan, you agree to let illegal mexicans live in american under any circumstances. You undercut border partol budgets. You refuse to invest in American Soil, and decide it best to Invest in America on foreign soil. Just those two things alone undermine America's financial and personal security, which now have come to light, with our defict being the largest ever, and so big, that it has sparked concern on a global level. Many ideas for going to war in Iraq have been proven to be false, yet you still justify your lies as you punish soldiers for following orders that eventually came from you.

Not much has changed since the first day you took office, but The biggest concerns have changed I guess. And what would those be?

The fact that Americans memories change on the whim, and the fact that you realized fear is your biggest allie in your fight for approval. Many people have used fear in the past to control, and many were successful. However, all seemed to forget that sooner or later, fear no longer works, becuase in the same way it did work....it will fail. And what will that way be?

The simple fact that people's memories are short and weak.

What does group teenager piss, fire, a kid named Dino, and a treehouse all have in common?
follow the link to find out!!
http://www.site4me.us/post/2/159

To read a story about a black man and me getting into an arguement(during my homeless days) click the link!!
http://www.site4me.us/post/2/158

1. I don't know you, put me on your friend's list damnit!
2. I scored better on the quiz then you.
3. wtf is my password?!!
4. I want uploads enabled!
5. Take me off your friend's list damnit!
6. Your Ugly.
7. I only made 20 entries today :(
8. I forgot to add my irl daily transcripts :(
9. I am NOT 10 years old!
10. Stop ranting on me! You suck bitch.

I thought I would give some advice, so that others may not make the same mistakes I have made, below is a partial list, take all in stride!


1. chitlings

n : small intestines of hogs prepared as food--Never pronounce as Ch-it-er-lings, in front of black people, they will laugh at you. Even though it is actually a form of the word

2. If you plan on staying after school, make sure EVERYONE is gone before you prop up on desk and pull pants down and jack off.

3. Smokes are kids best friends, just don't steal them then feel bad later and tell on yourself.

4. If you get in trouble.... LIE LIE LIE--but be sure to admit something ELSE less severe, that you are not in trouble for.

5. Mowing the grass does not always mean shaving your pubic hair.

6. When in doubt, hug a priest, but make sure to touch him first, that way he is freaked out and wont bother you.

7. If you hang around a kid with a gun, you will most likely get in trouble.

8. If you can't sleep, don't scream.

9. Breaking windows of your own home is NOT a way to cure boredom :(

10. M80's work best, if they don't see you.

11. Make friends with cops, but don't get cocky and hit them later.

12. If a cop ask you, "Do You have any grenades, handguns or bazooka's", it is NOT a good idea to answer with 'Not On Me'.

13. If your friend gets jealous of you and another friend, that is NOT an instant ticket to sex.

14. Having sex with the same gender is fine, having sex with your plastic filled pillow--is not.

15. If you hump your bed, at least oil the bed springs.

16. Don't start taking long showers when your 13, it only creates un-needed questions.

17. Just because your camping and have to share a sleeping bag with your best friend, doesn't mean he is that into you.

18. You can only have a best friend, if they can achieve more then your hand.

19. If you open the door to a store and scream, you better run fast.

20. Bike's are not faster then cop cars.

The Newer Video Game Called JFK: ReLoaded has caused some controversy in the typical Game Fashion. The Kennedy Family calls it outragous and disgusting, while other moral-Im Better Then You-God loving types, cry it's another way we have lost our morals.

At work the other day, I was speaking to a co-worker about the game and their views on it. They proclaimed it was outragous also, and that no one should be able to mock another persons death in a humor, profitable way. I asked him if he thought the game should be shelved, he said yea. I asked him what is the worst thing about the game and he replied that the mocking is bad, the entertainment aspect is bad, and the financial aspect is bad.

After all that was addressed, I then asked him what he thought about the movie JFK(with kevin costner) and all other forms of money making movies and stuff that has been made in the past. He thought that was ok. I asked him, why do you give reasons its wrong for a video game, yet those same reasons don't apply to movies or television. He decided it was time for him to leave at that time, and left the break room.

The biggest problem in America isn't morals or lack of it. I think the problem is that people always have a prejudiced point of view that does not stay consistent to their supposed beliefs. Then they want to blame others for not going along with their mountianess views while lacking to admit own fault.




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I am really Bored today.

Want to right about something.

So I SCREAM!!!!!! AHHHH!!!!!!

And like taking a poop, a thought plops out!

OMG, I just realized that Ima smoker!

SHAME ON ME! MY MORALS ARE GONE cause Im gay!

DAMN ME! IM GOING TO HELL BECUASE I HATE

GEORGE W. BUSH!

FUCK ME! I DONT GO TO CHURCH SO I AM

LED BY THE DEVIL!

ok... all gone now.........

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Since the music band Green Day released their latest album
American Idiot
Alot of people have once again become a Green Day Fan.
All Music has fair-weather, jump-on-the-band-wagon type fans but this
time it upsets me.

I have been a huge Green Day fan for years now.
Like first generation fans, I was 14-15 years old when the album Dookie hit the stores.
That was my first time hearing Green Day, and ever since I can't get enough of them.
I prefer their older stuff, that cameout before Dookie(before they were famous)over any other
songs.....until American Idiot came out.

When Nimrod was released, I was amazed at the braveness of Green Day, by trying a new thing.
I was also amazed at some of the songs like 'King For A Day' as the lyrics/music were so controversial
for any punk band at that time.
I tired of 'Time Of Your Life' pretty quickly, but found myself deep in tune with songs such as
Nice Guys Finish Last
King For A Day
Walking Contradiction


After 2 years of desperatly waiting for a new album, I still remember the day
I found out that they were working on a new one.
I counted down the days, like waiting for christmas.
I went to the music stores in awe of all their Green Day posters.
Before their album Warning came out they had a radio interview
where they previewed around 5 of their songs.
I didn't have a radio in the house so I sat in the car to listen to the hour long show.
I also pre-ordered the CD and was big grinned at the music counter when paying for it.
Once again I was in shock and awe, at the new sounds Green Day came out with.
As I grew, I respected the fact that Green Day also knew they had to grow.
Alot of people were angry with Warning, cause it was more Popish then Rockish.
Green Day lost alot of fans with Warning, but still they weren't deterred from their goal.

Now, brings me to American Idiot
It seems that all lost fans, have came back on board with Green Day.
It seems that Green Day has also been able to gain new fans by the millions.
For that fact I am very happy for Green Day.
But very pissed at the people also.
Green Day isn't a new band.
They have had many albums since Dookie.
Now people take notice again as if Green Day is a new band.

From my favorite song Jesus of Suburbia to all other songs
Once again Green Day has a place in my heart.
I have always liked Green Day.
I have always let known my love for Green Day and my disgust with people
calling them a sell-out and other slewd comments.

Why have most called them sell-outs?
Two reasons........
They signed on a big record label (Reprise)
They went Pop(or so people say, when people wanted to hear more punk)

Sell-outs they are not.
They left Lookout records and signed with Reprise because Lookout
is a small band label. They don't or didn't at the time, have the means to
Mass produce/Distribute in the way that Green Day needed to keep up with the fan base.
They went with Reprise so that they could fulfill their popularity needs.

Secondly, how can the be sell-outs for not constantly making music they way fans want?
That is the exact opposite of selling-out.

Do people even bother to get to know the real GreenDay?
They havent changed much from their past.
They havent been like most bands, who let money get to their head....

To all new and fair-weather Green Day fans..... Thanks for coming back on board.
But I know I will still be here long after you have left




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I am currently writing about my past sexual encounters since boyhood. to read and keep updated click the following link.

http://www.theshizatnetwork.us/fiction/viewstory.php?sid=12&i=1

yadayada
bladablada

Bush has a plan for America.
Fifty Percent of Americans blindly support this plan.
What is this plan?
To Americanize the world by Un-Americanizing America.
Why would Americans support the demise of their own country?
How could any president gain supprt to create a global
America, by detiorating America?
Very Simple.

Wealth Controls Stupidity.

Even so, how could the wealth blind people that badly?


Wealth today has changed greatly from wealth of the past.
Wealth of the past was largely a result of individual effort
whereas today it has become a group effort that steals and
silences the individual.

How so?
Since the 1970's, corporations grew and greatly defeated
small businesses.
Just some Examples are....
Wal-Mart
K-Mart
SBC Communications
AOL Time Warner

Radio stations, cable t.v., news outlets are
the big area where wealth stole from the individual which caused
National Control and biased views based on where the money was
coming from and going to.

With the slow but steady corporate take-overs, that caused
political donations and friendships which has only led
to biased and controlled reporting and decision making.

As the above was taking place these newly found
National Controls needed a way to reduce their cost.
Before, when it was locally owned, operated, employed, there
was no need to reduce cost, as cost were never that high.

In the search to reduce cost, it was found that all
America was interested in profits which turned the search
oversea's and mexico.

The outsourcing was done in very small amounts,
so no need to stop it was seen.
As companies saw the profits, they began to invest
in the government to elect persons
who would share their same business interest's.
Which is where we are at today.

It has been allowed to grow and embedd itself so deep
in the government, that we will never be able to stop
it by using traditional means.

Countries like India, immediatly applauded Bush being
re-elected, since they directly profit from Bush's plans
of sending U.S. Jobs oversea's. They were so happy, they
posted on many internet sites exclaiming how their companies
are now in no danger of not growing.
Bush is also currently working on redoing
U.S. Visa Laws to allow less restrictions for
immigrants that will work in America, at cheaper labor rates
then we Americans can afford at present.

It is estimated that there are 10 million illegal aliens in America.
With more then half being Mexican.
Instead of enforcing our nations Immigrant laws,
Bush see's fit to re-write the laws to allow
illegal immigrants, to stay in our country and work.

Those are two reasons(Of Many Many Reasons)we are losing America.
If Bush had his way, we would no longer be known by
The United States Of America but rather would be
The United Religious Countries Of America.

At the rate we are losing from within, it will get to the point
to where we can no longer sustain our own selves.
We will deny it was because we allowed all our jobs to
move overseas.
We will deny it is because we ignore our immigration laws.
We will deny we had any part in the fall.
We will however blame all homosexuals, since they are the
breed that is corrupting our nation.
Nothing else is to blame

Currently there is a battle regarding a science book and the Theory of Evolution.
What is causing the stupidity, is the fact that there is a 'disclaimer'
on the book, announcing that Evolution is only a theory, and not fact.

The religious rights are pleased the disclaimer is there
since it adds more credibility to their Fact of God Made Man.

Sure they want to forget all that science has found, proving that man
HAS Evolved, including the most recent finding a couple weeks ago
that are the remains of a woman who is similar to a Hobbit.

It can easily be accepted that other animals have evolved, but
claim that Man has, and you are condemned to hell.

I was smoking outside today.
While taking a puff, I noticed a plane in the sky.
I start to watch the plane, hoping to see it blow-up.

When I was a teen-ager and younger... I used to stare at planes in the sky.
I used to dream about me being on it.
Dream that it is taking me somewhere great,
and that I was doing something good.

That made me realize something today.
I have changed.

Once was a hopeful, dreaming, inspired person.
While now, all the people who said I was stupid for dreaming
seem to have won. But at what cost?

I badly want the dreamer in me back.
I badly want the smiler.

All this hate that consumes me now
Is really killing me.

Recently U.S. President Re-Elect, George W. Bush, released a statement outlining his Administration's current plans for leading the american people. As with most things that Mr.Bush does alone, we were quite shocked in his current plan of actions, considering the dilema The U.S. is currently in. Below is the announced Bush Administration Agenda for the American People: 1. Convince That Clinton Guy To Work For Us's. We do realized the need for our americans to become more united. That be the reason that Clinton fellar should be obliged to serve under us. He has that knack for working it in the middle. 2. Claim Iraq the 53rd State Wait, can they see that? I hope not. 2. (the real one). Ask Hilary If She Likes Me It is important that the wife of a well-liked president, likes me too 3. Declare Only Fuel Source Is Oil Outlaw any fuel source that won't make me rich won't benifit Americans 4. Make A Clone Of Me It's the only way to prove how bad stem cell research really is. I will take one for the team. 5. Hire Rocky's Speech Therapist I do realize I cant speak. I dream of fixing it. But it also got me re-elected. Daddy, what should I do? (call me please, I miss you------937-254-3562) 6. Wait For More TradeCenters To Fall Well, it's what got me re-elected. Can't blame me can ya? btw, can we rebuild them WTC's? Osama called and wants more targets. 7. Tell Cheney GAY IS NOT OK It looks bad that I want all gays killed, yet my employee supports them. If we can't get people to agree with us, we will resort to tactical manuevers to force mind control. Hitler at least had a goal. As you can see, it is clearly concerning. Mr. Bush......... .............................................................. .......................................................... ................................................... ............................................ ............................. .......... ...

What's that? Where is that at? Who are they?

We will all know about the Former African-French Colony soon.
Thanks in part to the recent violence there.
Just as fast, we will forget about the Ivory Cost.
But don't fret, before we forget, we will
have drilled into our heads, the knowledge of how
evil the Ivory Cost is.
We will know all about their politics.
We will all agree that they are evil and need
U.S. Support to kill every evil living being there.

In just the same fashion that we let ourselves become victims of the media,
we will assume all knowledge to forget the Ivory Cost.